What’s a topic or issue about which you’ve changed your mind?
I often changed my mind about how I approach my ‘bipolar disorder’.
A recent example is when decided to write openly about my diagnosis and my experience with ‘psychoses’.
I thought hard about it and reached the conclusion that if I, a university lecturer, can’t write about it, then who will?
Stigma is enormous in the field of mental illness. I know it all too well. I lost on a promotion once back in England because I disclosed my bipolar disorder. I was also bullied online. As a result, the spare articles about it on my blog, or for Mad in America, were constantly deleted by me (on my blog) or made anonymous on Mad in America by kind editors. They understood my plight: a single mum with bipolar disorder looking for a job. The label of bipolar disorder could ruin it for me.
But at some point, eventually, I decided not to hide it anymore. I told about it at my current job and received encouragement, reassurance, help and a permanent contract while I was in a hospital with a ‘psychosis’.
You can only imagine how it restored my faith in humanity! It gave me also the courage to continue writing. I think of all other people who sit at home, feeling ashamed, and I think of my students. A university that accepts diversity and is so kind to its employees is a university where students feel happy and welcomed. Which is the case. My university is amazing!
The thing with my bipolar diagnosis is that I am doing quite well with it. I found a brilliant psychiatrist who prescribed me medication that fits (no side effects), I am full of energy and have tremendous joie de vivre, and in general am happy!
And I want others, those who feel lost in the domain of psychiatric diagnoses, to feel happy too.
It is possible and it’s the reason I write.
Leave a Reply